or how the current lexicon is causing E.B. White, William Strunk, William Safire and William F. Buckley, along with countless other Williams of note, to turn over in their various resting places
It’s a changing world with, apparently, a new take on burgers. My favorite burgers are abundant with melted cheese a top medium rare prime ground beef (sadly illegal - any below medium that is - in some states like North Carolina) hugged by deliciously sweet brioche buns.
These days, however, it seems almost anything constitutes a burger. According to current lexicon burgers don’t even need to include protein or condiments or buns - say what?? - some burgers, are just plain “nothing burgers.”
Prime (without the beef of course) examples of “nothing burgers” include:
“Nothing Burger” # 1 - The Conway, Gorka, Spicer and Huckabee-Sanders
“Nothing Burger” #2 - Alternative Facts
“Nothing Burger” #3 - Fake News
“Nothing Burger” #4 - No There There
“Nothing Burger” #5 - Nothing Burger
It stands to reason that if there are “nothing burgers”, there must also be “something burgers” - right? Right.
Examples of substantive “something burgers” include:
“Something Burger” #1 - Collusion, Delusion, Illusion, Russia
“Something Burger” # 2 - Narcissist, Ego-maniac, Pathologic, Lier, Our President
“Something Burger” #3 - Putin, Meddling, Russia
“Something Burger” #4 - Incessant, inane, impulsive, highly inappropriate, false, dangerous, distracting mean tweets, BAD, SAD, MAD, Our President
“Something Burger” # 5 - Muslim Ban, P**##**y Grabbing, colorful showers, Our President
“Something Burger” # 6 - Bannon, Brietbart, Duck Dynasty
“Something Burger” # 7 - Flynn, Sessions, Comey, loyalty oaths (“kiss my ring” PU-LEEEZE), obstruction of justice, Our President, Russia
“Something Burger” # 8 - Recusals, Refusals, dismissals - “You’re fired”, a plethora
“Something Burger” # 9 - Donald Trump, Jr., Manafort, Kushner, Russian Government lawyer (dah), Russian American lobbyist, handsome Rob Goldstone (nyet), who else??????, meeting with Russians, quid pro quo anyone?
“Something Burger” # 10 - Facts
“Something Burger” # 11 - News
“Something Burger” # 12 - There
All for now - must run, my medium rare kobe beef burger with grilled vidalia onions, melted swiss cheese, shitake mushrooms, heirloom tomatoes, truffle aoili and arugula on a toasted brioche bun awaits.
